यस्मान्नोद्विजते लोको लोकान्नोद्विजते च य: |
हर्षामर्षभयोद्वेगैर्मुक्तो य: स च मे प्रिय: || 15||
Translation: My devotees who aren’t any source or foundation for causing displeasure or irritation to anyone, and at the same time are not disturbed and agitated by anyone; are very neutral in both pain and pleasure, are free from worries, fears and anxiety are the devotees who are very Dear to me.
Stress has unfortunately become an eminent part of our lives. And this stress hinders our vision to look at the world with compassion and love. We have become slaves of this stress. But, really is this stress needed? And how come it has entered our lives and conquered us?
Let us begin with understanding the lives we are living today. The first thing we want to do is appreciation from everyone. We do not let others reject us in any way. We are agitated by even a small rejection, let alone be the rejection of our family members. Everyone wants to be liked by everyone. But, let us think of this deeply. Is this really possible? I mean how can everyone have the same likes, dislikes as well as same thinking process. We are wired differently. Each one of us has a unique position in this system. We don’t need approval from others to be in this position. We need to love ourselves first before expecting others to do the same. Only when we feel whole and complete from within, then we can experience completion on the outside. This will eliminate the major source of stress from our lives.
Secondly, we want to be a part of everyone’s lives. When someone is discussing their problems or issues, we happily want to give them solutions. And if the person is against receiving these solutions or implementing them, we feel offended. We forget that sometimes all that the person needs is a hearing ear. We take their stress as our own and start webbing around it. Another need of the hour is to stop always being a solution bearer.
Krishna has wonderfully put up in this shloka that we need to focus on ourselves, on our life. No one needs to be source of displeasure to anyone and neither do we need to get affected. This can truly happen only when we start focusing within. In this chaotic time, he calls us to look what is happening inside us. When we are focused on dealing the issues we are dwelling inside, we will no longer have the need to be stressed. When our own inner emotional needs will be met, we will allow peace to come within. And honestly, as we are progressing materialistically, it is also time to progress spiritually and humanly.
Another important point which needs our attention is when Krishna talks about being neutral about both pain and pleasure. We need to understand as well as accept that both pain and pleasure go hand-in-hand. Both are inevitable part of our fates. Hence, being angry in pain and over the moon in pleasure needs to stop. One needs to be courageous to accept the pain as it brings in wisdom, whilst pleasure is the fruit of the hard work. Integrating both of them without being attached to them is the key to true Bhakti and devotion to the Divine Krishna. And when this freedom from attachment is attained, one becomes free from fears and anxiety too. This leads you to the path of true salvation.
The world of Illusion: Our Self Image
Having a perfect image in front of the world is something we crave for. We want to look perfect; we want our behavioural skills to be appealing and our attitude to be inspiring. We would never like our self-image to be tarnished in any form ever. In our own eyes or front of the world, the perfection of our image has to be there. But who decides about this self-image? What is the measuring scale for it? Who has created this?
Thousands of questions about this topic need to be understood and answered before deciding on it. First, let us take a small example of anger. When we are angry with someone, we lash out at them, tell them mean things. Then, once the anger has settled down, we repent and then push ourselves to ask them for forgiveness. But is this the right way? Does asking for forgiveness mean that we have learned our lesson that anger is toxic, and we never allow this situation to repeat. Absolutely NO! We haven’t learned this lesson yet. Sincere repentance is when we promise deep within ourselves that we will not be angry instead of giving excuses the next time. Or perhaps the person hurt my self-respect, so I had to be angry.
Let us take another example of how conscious we are about self-image from Bhagavad Gita.
The Sutra says – “Arjun: O Krishna, how can I fight on this battlefield? How can I raise my bow and aim my arrow at Bheeshma, our respectable father, and Dhronacharya – both of whom I revere?”
When Bheeshma comes to the fight on the battlefield, Arjuna is not ready to battle against him. Because he feels that if he fights against his Guru, his father-like figure, and his brothers, his self-image will be ruined completely. He tells Krishna that he is willing to die instead of battling against his people. Then, at least, people will remember him for sacrificing his life over fighting with his family members. This example is when we can understand that “I” is the starting point of our self-image ego. When Krishna was explaining Arjun about being detached from everything and completing his Karma, he did not listen to it.
Likewise, we human beings always listen to what we want to hear. We see what we want to see. Hence, our view for looking at any situation is never 360 degrees. It is minimal. We have developed our image in our minds. And we want to live up to it. We forget that, like us, everyone has built their image in their mind. And it is this self-image that does not let us see anything in its complete form. We see illusions of our minds and not the actual situation in front of us.
The psychology of Gestalt states that every human being can view one object differently. For instance, if three are to look in the sky, each one of them will have a different view of the sky. For person A, it will be a beautiful sky with birds flying carefreely. Likewise, for person B, it will be a routine sky where just the birds are flying. And person C may notice that the birds are flying in a constellation-like pattern and an Aeroplan passing. This example shows that every human being is different. Hence, we think differently. We all have a world of our own within. So, there will be another benchmark for how someone should behave or their attitude towards life. Based on these factors, the scale for measuring self-image will be different for everyone.
The most important takeaway is that we need to shed the concept of self-image completely. Living your life without the burden of showing different faces to the world will make life simplified. And to focus on your Karma, you need a calm mind. Shedding this burden will make your mind, body, and soul feel lighter and brighter.
